Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
