Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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