Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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