he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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