Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
