Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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