Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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