im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
