i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize