i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
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