with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
