I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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