Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
