Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Operation Purity has been aborted
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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