im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
