You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
