I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
