NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
