What tipped you off? The sombrero?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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