idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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