were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
