So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
