I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
