I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
