and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
