there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
