if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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