were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize