My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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