Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
