he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize