I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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