The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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