New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
My pussy is not your playground.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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