We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
