It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
