Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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