He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
