Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Randomize
