My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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