hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
So squirting runs in the family.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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