I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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