Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
