my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
