I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
You don't make any sense
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