You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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