Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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