We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
thus making me awesome and them whores
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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