32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
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