I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I am mentally ready for anal.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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